Topic > Death of a Loved One: Coping with Loss and Healing

IndexIntroductionThe Tragic Death of a Loved OneCoping Mechanisms After DeathConclusionIntroductionLife is full of many recurring implications, to which we continually seek answers in the guided question of Why? As the days grow shorter, I find myself thinking about the many elements of this world. During my 18 years of life, I have been subjected to countless events. I faced a treacherous journey that involved moments of hopelessness and hopelessness. Significantly, I have seen countless numbers of my relatives leave this earth and pieces of me slowly fade away with them, struck by a pain that even years later still haunts me. For many, the death of a loved one can be a difficult thing to understand. Often, people can use an experience such as the death of a loved one as an opportunity to redefine their life, while transforming their perspective on how they experience life. The idea of ​​death has always been a recurring topic in my life, since the age of 6. I believe that many human beings can analyze the idea of ​​death as a scary, terrifying, and undeniable topic. However, the reality is that a human being is about being born into this world and facing the challenge of death, as part of our life's journey, which then becomes a shadow inflicted on us forever. Say no to plagiarism. Get a tailor-made essay on "Why Violent Video Games Shouldn't Be Banned"? Get an Original Essay The Tragic Death of a Loved One Initially, during my adolescence I consistently perceived death as temporary and reversible, a belief reinforced by cartoon characters who had died and been reborn. Consequently, this miraculous belief would never have been true for my father, a healthy 53-year-old man, who collapsed at work on Boxing Day 2008 and was immediately transported to hospital. After various tests, he underwent two MRIs that revealed a small brain mass, and the next morning he underwent emergency brain surgery. About a week later a phone call advised him to go to Princess Margaret Hospital, where the biopsy results revealed that my father had a stage IV glioblastoma multiforme brain tumor. Therefore, this primary brain tumor is recognized as the most aggressive and invasive form of cancer, where many individuals, including my father, live with only a 9-12 month survival rate. Reflecting on this experience I believe it had a negative impact on my life due to the series of events that occurred. The last month of my father's life, one of his colleagues arranged his illegal discharge from hospital without proper legal authorization or consent. A few hours after my father left the hospital, community care contacted my mother regarding the release and despite numerous attempts to remove my father from this individual's control and private residence, the authorities, the public guardian and the trustee did not intervene. We were barred from having any knowledge or contact regarding my father's well-being, as this was all part of an elaborate scheme to defraud my father's estate. This colleague continued to misrepresent herself, without any proper legal authority. Unbeknownst to him or us, my father was isolated and confined to his colleague's home due to being bedridden, unable to walk, and losing the ability to speak. He was under the dominion of his colleague and her family, in the final stages of life. My father died in a Toronto hospital and his burial was the next day and notwe were never informed. This denied us the right and privilege to attend his funeral and say goodbye, which left my mother and I with no sense of closure. Analyzing this experience there are many unfair components that I now see differently than when I was a child. . In an effort to obtain a government death benefit, a monumental stone was placed on my father's grave, once again denying us this privilege of properly recording his name and inserting appropriate wording. My father died without knowing that a fraudulent "Last Will and Testament" document had been drawn up, two months before his death. Three lawyers facilitated the estate fraud, one drafted the fraudulent will, another severed our property title, another commissioned documents falsely. A judge eventually declared the fraudulent document “null and void” and 4 years later named my mother the only legally appointed “estate trustee.” Even though my mother was the winning party, and due to the filing of the lawsuit, the judge ordered my mother to pay the defendant's legal fees of $50,000 by September 2022. The defendant had no money to pay the legal fees of my mother, but since our house was returned to us, it seems that we end up paying for our robbery. Coping Mechanisms After Death These circumstances have imposed hardships, limitations, and sacrifices, but I have grown immensely from this experience. Coping mechanisms like writing have played such a vital role in how to express my emotions effectively. Writing became the journey to acceptance, as well as allowing me to express my experience of grief and gain awareness of the loss itself. For many years I struggled to understand my father's death, due to denial of dreaming of the event as an illusion, something that wasn't real, having never had the chance to say goodbye to him. However, this mechanism helped in reflection, a way to explore and discover my thoughts and feelings. Writing was primarily an endless process of giving in to new ideas and thoughts that could be expressed through words that led to clarification and understanding of certain situations, including death. This creative outlet has continually encouraged me to incorporate events based solely on my life when writing poetry, short stories, and more. For example, my children's book incorporated the challenge of losing my father to the life-threatening illness of brain cancer at Christmas time. In particular, this book was a way to represent my feelings in a place where I felt safe, comfortable, and could communicate effectively. However, I believed that this story could not only help me in my gradual grieving process, but also help many other children who were trying to cope with the loss of a loved one at such a young age. Because of the premeditated financial greed surrounding my father's estate fraud, the outcome of this event can be shown as unjust, through the agonizing trauma that was inflicted on both my mother and me, the innocent parties. I ask myself many questions, as to how such individuals can get away with such criminal acts, let alone organize a funeral without notifying his immediate family, as well as the installation of a monumental stone. In many ways I reflect on these four critical years as the definitive transformation of my life, a family that was always together, never separated, denied by closure and left with an ongoing legal dispute. However, the negative impacts of this experience taught me to acquire mature qualities at such a young age. In many ways, I have.